I am really torn between wanting to vent and get this out and wondering if I should say anything at all. because sometimes things you post on your personal blogs or facebooks can come back to bite you in the tail.
Last night, or actually late yesterday evening, my family recieved a visit from Child Protective Services regarding reports of physical and mental abuse. You could have knocked me over with a feather. And actually I think from the time they walked thru our doors I kinda just zoned out. Apparently Brandon, my 10 year old, has told my mother that Bob spanks him and has left bruises on him. I'm not going to say he has never gotten a spanking.....but certainly NEVER been beaten and bruised. So my mother made the report....which was apparently several pages long. And while this lady was in our house asking questions, and she was nice about everything, Brandon jumps up and starts to scream about how mean evryone is to him, how he gets spanked for no reason, how Bob has illegal guns in the house (he does have guns but the ARE legal AND locked up) It was just insane. He told the investigator that he wasn't safe here.....NO ONE was safe. I thought for sure they would haul him out right them and there.
I don't know where this is coming from....he accused Bob of throwing bottles at him, calling him names. Outlandish , crazy stuff. I swear, this was not my child I saw.....so the investigators split, there were 2, and they all interviewed the all of the boys. None of them said they felt scared or unsafe here or have seen either Bob or myself EVER treat Brandon like that.
So we will be dealing with these people for a little bit while they do their investigation. I realize theya re jsut doing their job and that every report that comes in needs to be treated as a priority and checked....but I feel so violated. I had to sign papers saying I would not physically discipline any of my children until they revisit. And Brandon was sitting there the whole time with this smug look on his face. As they were getting ready to leave Brandon started piping up again and the investigator told him he needed to sit down and shut it up. That just because we couldn't swat him didn't mean we couldn't send him to bed, ground him, or take priviledges away. And she added that she seen thru what he was attempting to do and he was not going to run our house.
So I dunno what's gonna happen. I am hurt, angry, sad, depressed.....you name the emotion and I am probably feeling it right now. All of the boys are mad at brandon and I told them to just act like everything was normal and go back to business as usual but they won't even talk to him. And just minutes after they left Brandon was acting like his "normal" self and hugging me and telling me he loved me and stuff.......so odd.
Over the past few months he has been my problem child. Stealing, lying, bad grades at school, destroying property here at home. But I never in a million years saw this coming......and with the help of my own mother at that. Which actually should not surprise me but the thing is SHE was very abusive to me growing up......plus I was sexually abused by a family member fromthe time I was 5 until I was 13..............told everyone I could think of and no one would listen to me or help me b ecause she could talk her way out of most anything. And she went on to be a police officer and she thinks that badge gives her special rights when it comes to ruining peoples lives I guess. It has takem me over 30 years to get to a lace where I could forgive her and think that maybe she did the best she could when I was growing up.........now I see she hasn't changed one bit......it's all about what she wants. A month or so back she tried to get me to let her have custody of Brandon because I was so stressed out.....made it out like she would be helping me......he's my son and I said nope....he will stay with me! Brandon is her favorite.....she ignores the other boys and dotes on him.
Right now I'm not even sure I am making sense.....my family is so dysfunctional I'm sure sure that it is even possible for it to make sense. And I am doing good just to manage this migraine :(
Just keep us in your prayers please.....I don't know waht is going on with Brandon, whether this is a cry for attention or if my mom has put him up to it.......hopefully it will all come out in the wash and this investigation will pass rather quickly. I love my kids to death and it would totally kill me if anything happened to any of them or if they had to leave.